5 Parts of a Great Date

How often do you and your wife go on a date?  With a typical busy American schedule these days I would guess not enough.  Well your schedule isn't going to open up anytime soon so you're going to need to schedule a date and quit waiting for an open evening.  If its been too long, here are the 5 simple steps to planning a date with your wife. 

1.  Research.  You must know your wife.  You have to know what she wants, likes, needs, etc.  Does she like surprises?  Does she need to know ahead of time?  Does she like to dress up or keep it casual?  Does she new experiences or old favorites?  These are all things that you need to learn, relearn, and continue to learn as you pursue her.  Research also includes date, time, childcare, transportation, cost, payment, etc...

2. The Ask. So you've decided on a cool, fun, romantic, date idea.  Great. Now take it to the next level by asking her on a date in a cool, unique, fun, romantic way.  Write a poem or a love note.  Make an invitation.  Leave a note on her mirror, drawer, or pillow.  Hand deliver a hand made card with a sonic drink at work.  Whatever it is, ask her in a way that you do not normally communicate. 

3. The Main Course.  Basically every date revolves around a meal.  This could be breakfast, lunch, or dinner.  Whatever works best for HER schedule. Saturday morning brunch can be just as romantic as Friday night dinner.  The main course also means meaningful conversation.  The best way to have meaningful conversation is to listen more than you talk.  The best way to listen more than you talk is by asking open ended questions.  Here are a few questions that I dare you to ask:  What do you like most about work?  What challenges are you facing at work?  How can I pray for you this week?  Has God been teaching you anything lately?  What are some ways that I can better serve you?  Who have been some spiritual mentors in your life?  What is one way you think I can improve as a father/husband?  As you can see, these questions are meaningful and you better be prepared for the answers.  Your goal is not to justify your actions but to gather information.  Take notes if you need to.

4.  The Activity. All dates should also include doing something other than eating.  The best is a walk in the park, lake, or scenic area.  It could be something she likes to do, has always wanted to do, or has talked about doing.  It should NOT be a movie, play, or other form of entertainment that doesn't allow talking unless you do something after. 

5. The End. The end of the date is equally as important as the beginning.  Recap how you liked spending quality time with her and specifically what you enjoyed about the date.  Take a moment to ask her out again and schedule another date within the next 2 weeks so you will have something to look forward to.  If you want to improve your marriage you are going to have to actively pursue your wife!!!



Whatever you decide to do, Be intentional.  Your date does not have to be fancy or cost a lot of money but it does need to be well thought out.  It is perfectly acceptable to be cheesy.  Ask her in a love note or poem.  Plan a 3 course meal at 3 different locations.  Make her an invitation.  Go on a picnic.  Have a theme.  Whatever it is, it can't be what you normally do.

There are billions of ideas online by simply googling date night ideas but the best ones are the ones that you create. 

Here is a link to a short article about how to talk to your wife on a date. Questions for your wife. 

The time you normally spend on Facebook, checking box scores, reading the news, playing Solitaire or Temple Run, or however your normally waste those short moments of down time, needs to be spent figuring out how you're going to sweep her off of her feet.