The Next Level

Coffee & Pop & POP's

 A few weeks ago I took my wife on an adventure.  I know my wife and I know she likes surprises.  I told her what to pack and when we were leaving.  We woke up, got ready, jumped in the car, and headed toward our destination.  After a few miles I informed her that we were going on a Route 66 Adventure: Experience 66 things on Route 66. 

We stopped at many landmarks, visited historic places, took random pictures, drove through clouds, had great conversations, stayed in a Mansion, ate a gourmet French breakfast, enjoyed local sushi & coffee, got a massage, bought something from a garage sale, visited 2 college campuses, had a quick visit with an old friend, and so much more.

I do not share this with you to boast, but to share with you the art of taking a date to the next level.  Here is what I mean...

Round Barn in Arcadia

Like you, my wife and I have a pretty packed schedule and we could always use some time away.   Fortunately, we live in the education world so we are able to enjoy a fall break.  We had about 36 hours to have fun, relax, and recharge so we couldn't go too far and didn't want to spend much money.  About a month before, I saw a Groupon for a Bed & Breakfast in Tulsa.  It was for a one night stay at the Kennedy Mansion, a couples massage, and a gourmet breakfast.  It was relatively close, reasonably priced, and had the potential of being relaxing and fun so I booked it.

Local Coffee House Favorites

Now this is where most people stop.  They say, "Hey Honey, lets go stay
at a B&B in Tulsa this weekend."  And that would be okay.  If it stopped right here it would be good.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with this you would probably agree that sweet things like this need to happen more often.  However, my college baseball coach, Coach Myers, frequently told us that "Good is the enemy of Great."  So I asked myself, "How can I take a good weekend getaway to the next level and make it a great adventure?"


1.  Know your date. This is the most important aspect.  Whether you have been dating for a month or 30 years, know what they like and don't like.  Listen to what they have been wanting to do.  Make sure this is current because they may have liked it 2, 10, 25 years ago doesn't mean they still do.  I know my wife and I know she likes surprises, road trips, and experiencing new things.

2.  Ask Next Level Questions.  What would make this date better?  You have a destination.  Can you change how to get there?  What is around the destination that you can incorporate into the date?  How much time do you have to spend before or after?  For me it was... "What if we took Route 66 from OKC to Tulsa?  It would take longer but we could stop and take a picture of all the historic landmarks that helped make this area famous.  We can't check in until 3pm so what if we not only visited Route 66 but also famous places in Tulsa as well?  What if we did 66 things on Route 66?  We both like sushi and coffee so what if we visited some of the unique places in Tulsa? I don't have time to come up with 66 things so instead of crossing off 66 things what if we simply experienced 66 things on Route 66 and created our own list and adventure?"

The Golden Driller

3.  Build Excitement.  You have to tell them what you're doing without telling them what you're doing.  For example, I asked my wife about 2 weeks in advance to block out her schedule for an adventure.  Of course she asked questions, but I asked her to trust me.  As it got closer to time I made a packing list, answered any questions I could about clothing, activities, etc so she would not stress.  This is much different from a total surprise of telling them the day before or even day of.  The excitement becomes overshadowed by worrying about this, thinking about that, what to wear, what to pack, etc... if you don't give parameters.


4.  Reveal With Enthusiasm.  There is something to be learned from Extreme Home Makeover.  They don't just make over a home and have the family pull up in the driveway and say "Hey we fixed your home up nice."  The crowd is gathering, excitement is building, the bus is blocking their view, and then everyone screams "MOVE THAT BUS!"  They cry, jump up and down, and hug whoever is closest.  I pulled up a YouTube video of the old song "Get your kicks on Route 66" and played it as a hint.  She guessed a few things and then told her with excitement that we were going to get our kicks by experiencing 66 things on a Route 66 adventure!!  


5.  Be Confident - Sometimes you can't help but be cheesy, sappy, and goofy.  Just admit it, accept it, and go with it.  It is better to be sappy and cheesy in an attempt to be sweet than to not attempt to be sweet.  Plus, worrying about what people think is a gigantic waste of time. 

Praying Hands at ORU in Tulsa

6.  Be Flexible - Things are not always going to go as planned.  You're going to have to keep your eyes open and be ready to call an audible.  Sometimes it will be a complete bomb; just admit it and redeem yourself next time.  Other times it will go 1,000 times better than you ever expected.  For example, Katy and I went to Oral Roberts University to go to the prayer tower.  It didn't open for another hour.  This could have been tragic.  It was something that I really wanted to do.  Rather than being ticked off and pouting all day, I called an audible and we walked around campus and ate lunch in a cafe on campus.  We ended up meeting a Resident Director (same job as Katy) and she had a wonderful conversation with someone from her field at a different college, which rarely happens. 

The great thing about taking a date to the next level is that it is relatively free!  Going from staying at a Bed & Breakfast to going on a Route 66 Adventure only cost a little more gas mileage.    It's not like we bought expensive tickets to a fantastic show or concert, went to a fancy, pricy restaurant, or even went to an over priced movie.  All we did was think, observe, and experience. 

Blue Whale in Catoosa

The next time you take someone on a date, spend a few moments to take it to the next level!